Adoption class

Cameron and I attended the first of 4 foster/adopt classes on Saturday. There was a lot of really great information, all though Cameron and I were often quite bored... They spent a ton of time talking about the foster system and fostering. The thing is, when you are a concurrent foster parent (which means approved for adoption) you can choose to either be a normal foster parent while waiting for the children you'll adopt, or you can just wait until they have the children you are likely to be able to adopt. We have chosen the latter. So a good amount of the info did not apply to us. Plus, there were a lot of hypothetical questions that led us onto tangents....oiy. There was good info too though. For those who don't know, one of the downsides of adopting through the county is that these children have not been given up voluntarily. Therefore there is a chance that they will be reunited with their biological parents. By waiting and not fostering early, we lower the chance significantly that these kids will be sent back home. We won't be called until the social worker is pretty confident that we'll be able to adopt. Ok I don't know how to say this without sounding callous, but we were really excited to learn that they have a book of sibilings waiting for adoptive homes. Obviously, I feel horrid for all those poor kids, especially the ones who will eventually be separated because no one will take siblings. But Cam and I want siblings, so not only do we get to know we kept family together, but we'll get called a hec of a lot faster! I didn't realize so many people were not open to siblings. I know it's a lot, but I love the idea of being able to tell my babies that they had the same birth lady. Hopefully it will help them to continue to feel connected as a family and not feel like they have no attachment to their biological roots. After watching a video and hearing more about the foster process, I will say this. I am more determined than ever to have a closed adoption, and to keep our age limit to two. I have a friend who has had a rough time with her open adoption. It takes away from our motherhood, and I just can't do it. When I adopt my babies, I will be there mother for time and all eternity. One of the workers there told us something her adopted daughter said and I loved it! She said, some babies grow in tummies and some babies grow in hearts. Isn't that awesome?

We visted the ancient ruins called Tulum, while in Mexico. It was facinating.

Adoption

When I was first researching adoption in our county, I found serveral blogs written by adoptive parents chronicling their experiences adopting. It was very interesting and quite helpful to read about, not to mention just comforting knowing that someone was going through the same thing. So, I decided to chronicle Cameron's and my experience in our blog. Theses posts will always be labeled "Adoption". 

One day I was talking to a friend of mine, when she asked me if Cameron and I had considered adoption. It was kind of funny because she felt prompted to ask me but almost didn't because she felt it was too personal of a question. Thank goodness however, she did ask me. I told her that Cameron and I had strated looking into the process in IL, but it's very expensive and since we moved we had to basically start all over. With the move and everything, it would be a while before we could save up the money to adopt through LDS social services. 

She told me that the county we live in, Contra Costa County, has a foster-adopt program that has no cost to the Parents. I about fell off my chair. I was absolutely speechless. I couldn't believe what I was hearing, could we really be that lucky? Would we actually be able to adopt in the near future? I bombarded her with questions about it, and I must have asked her at least 4 or 5 times if she was sure it was free. She and her husband had started the process but stopped due to pregnancy, so she knew quite a bit about it. 

I went home and looked up the website, I spent all evening reading about the program and other people's experiences. When I told Cameron about it that night, he was also in shock. Eventually we got over our shock and moved into action! 

We attended an orientation where they told us about the county, the process, and other information. It was really informative and by the time we left, we really excited! We had heard from our friends that the people in this program were extremely wonderful, and the people at the orientation certainly lived up to that. This county really puts the children first. They try to place kids so that they only go to one foster home, then are either adopted or returned to family. They don't want them bounced around. Isn't that awesome? The biggest road block with adopting through the county is making sure that we are comfortable with the fact that these children are considered "at risk".  As opposed to LDS social services, these kids are removed from their homes, usually due to neglect. There is the possibility of drug addiction through the mother for an infant, and also the risk that a child placed with us could be re-united with their parents. I prayed hard about this, and in a blessing, the answer I was given was that we were doing the right thing and that there was a baby waiting for us. So I figure, if we get a placement and they are taken away, then the Lord will give me the strength to deal with it, or it won"t happen. I'm just having faith and putting it in God's hands.

We have to do a live scan, which is digital fingerprinting. We have to have 27 hours of training, which they provide, called PRIDE classes. We had TONS of forms to fill out too. Honestly, our hardest decision so far was picking our references. We were not allowed even onre family member as a reference. The hard part is finding people who had known both of us a long time, could recomend us based on their knowledge of us with children, and making sure they were responsible enough to fill the form out and return it promptly. We were able to pick four though, and they were all sooooo wonderful about getting the forms in quickly. 

The forms consisted of: Budget statement, health statements, scale drawings of our home and the pool area at our apartment, background check releases for every state lived in in the last 5 yrs, Applications for the live scan, copies of drivers liscence, and a few others. Our live scan is set for June 25th. After that and the PRIDE classes, they will do our homestudy. They will come to our home and make sure it meets the standards for the state and county. 

We were more than willing to take twins, and when I asked pne of the women at the orientation about it, she said if we were willing to take a sibling set, we would get placement faster. She said last year, they had 7 sets of twins that they couldn't find homes for! I couldn't believe it! WHERE WAS I??? Anyway, Cam and I discussed the possibility of taking a sibling set and it felt really right. So we told them that we would love a sibling set if the oldest was 2 or under and we would like and infant. I thought a lot about it and felt that 2 was as old as I was ready to go right now. At 2, kids are still young enough that the likelyhood of abuse is very slim, and they are still developing their personalities. I obviously can't say for sure, but I get the feeling we are going to be blessed with two. As my mom said, I need to catch up! :)

We are trying to keep ouselves from going crazy, but now that it is so close I am having a hard time being patient! So we started re-arranging our furniture to pill the piano and desk out of the second bedroom so that it can be a nursery. Unfortunately , our apartment is a little small, but it will do for now. Hopefully we can buy a house when our lease is up next february. I'll write about decorating and more in my next adoption post.

I forgot I even had a blog...

So, I set up a blog the other day...then today I realized I already have one. Lol! So I guess I should update this one. :) Cameron and I are living in CA now. He got a job with California State University East Bay. I started going to school there, but that school is soooooo screwed up. So I'm starting classes with Grand Canyon University on June 29th. I'll be getting my BA in English literature online. 

I've started singing with two ther wonderful women and we call our selves, A New Light. Our website is www.anewlightmusic.com. We just posted two recordings, The National Anthem and Amazing Grace. These are our arrangements as well. We write our own harmonies. I'm so proud of them! The Lord has blessed us with an incredible gift. We have a lt of fun and hope to do youth firesides.

Cameron and I start foster/adoption classes through the county next saturday. We will be done with them on the 18th of July. Then we have to do our homestudy. We are hoping to be approved by the end of August. I try not to get my hopes up...but I can't help it!! We bought an adorable crib and my mom got us the cutest crib set! We are doing the nursery mostly in cream, tan, and red. The only problem is that if we are lucky enough to get two children, it will be  an interesting job trying to fit two beds in our little second bedroom. A challenge I welcome though!

Cameron and I finally got a honeymoon last April. We went to Cancun for a week. It was sooooooooooo amazing! We had the best time and can't wait to go back.

I'm hoping to get some students for teaching voice lessong soon. I'm actually really excited to teach! I love the idea of helping someone else expand their instrument and learn how to use it properly. 

Cameron's job is going ok. He loves it, but the state of California is SOOOOO very screwed up that things are a little tentative right now. It really really expensive to live here, and the chancellor just approved the possibility for salary cuts, unpaid time off, and/or furloughs. We are little concerned about eating...but these days we are just grateful that he has a job!

S thats mostly whats going on with us. :)